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![[VIDEO] Our pretty disastrous “South African” custard tarts](http://www.mydaddycooks.com/wp-content/themes/eVid/timthumb.php?src=http://www.mydaddycooks.com/custardicon1.jpg&h=185&w=185&zc=1)
I am sure many of you have been waiting for the real disaster video. The one where nothing goes right in the kitchen, where chaos reigns and the result is something virtually inedible. Well, here it is! No-one can ever accuse me of cleverly editing out the mishaps after this video!
It all started with such good intentions. I wanted to mark the start of the World Cup so decided to make something South African. With the help of my friend Rebecca Leuw – and some very kind South Africans on twitter, such as Melanie Shearn and Jeanne from Cook Sister Blog – I decided to try to make a South African Milk Tart. The only problem being that the true “melktert” involves a number of stages to prepare and I just knew Archie wouldn’t last the course. The recipe needed tweaking to make it “Archie-friendly”, as I always do here. So I adapted it, and adapted it some more – and it became less like a Milk Tart and more like a traditional British custard tart. What could possibly go wrong? Store-bought pastry, an easy custard mix…
Well, the pastry tarts shrunk, puffed up, flopped – in fact everything they could have done to make it almost impossible to make the tarts (as is rightly pointed out in the comments below, either baking the tarts blind or chilling the cases first would have helped – but all that seemed too long with an excitable toddler in the kitchen!). Archie was in destructive mode, making one of his “soups” during the breaks (the video has footage of this too) and everything contrived to make these tarts officially the worst thing we have made on the blog. They may even be the worst thing I have made in a long time!
For what it’s worth, the custard filling was actually pretty tasty. If you have the time to make your own sweet pastry dough – or have better luck with some store bought dough – these may well be worth making. Failing that, enjoy our kitchen disaster!
Makes 9 mini tarts
1 pack pre-rolled shortcrust pastry
150ml full-fat milk (semi-skimmed will be fine too)
150ml single cream
2 whole eggs and 1 extra egg yolk
2 tbsp caster sugar
1 cinnamon stick
A drop of vanilla essence
Cinnamon powder
Pre-heat your oven to 200C/ 400F/ Gas Mark 5
Cumin might have improved them!????Well done for remaining stoic..and smiling through out…..!!!
The tarts look lovely and I am sure they tasted good too. Everyone has disasters in the kitchen, usually without a young child helping them so don't worry about it.
I really laughed watching this. Bless Archie, he and I have a shared love of vanilla, it would seem!
I'm sure it'll amuse you to hear that while watching this video Bug broke into a massive grin and screamed 'DADDY!' Er, not quite dear. Nevermind, as long as her actual daddy doesn't find out she seems better acquainted with your face than his, I think his ego will remain intact!
Is it horribly vicious that I'm a bit glad these didn't work out too well? If they had I would have been pining for milk tarts like my nanny used to make me and I'm really not sure oatmilk could have substituted in this case!
that was brilliant! You are so patient Nick – the worst thing you said was 'oh dear'. You were even still smiling at the end.
And it has to be said that if something like this can happen to someone like you it makes me feel slightly better – about my terrible, unreliable, inconsistent oven you understand…..
They look fine! I agree with Emma – you're so stoic! I'd have been ranting. I have two whinges though – no baking beans when baking blind? And vanilla ESSENCE? how could you? LOL x
LOL!!
The vanilla essence is a tired brain talking! It was vanilla extract, I promise!!
I couldn't face baking them blind and all the recipes I saw said to cook the cases without cooking them blind!
Now you mention it, that is probably where this went so wrong!!!
x
"they burnt?….. Oh, Oh dear"
Another classic
Just logged on after seening your article in Sainsbury's Little Ones and it was a total joy to watch – I hope I have your patience when I'm cooking with my son – he's only 6months old at the moment, but I have to admit you make it look so much fun – I'll defo be getting my husband to watch too
… hope you keep it up cause I'll be tuning in regularly now
extract or essence, I thought that was going to be a disaster! I have made the mistake before of pouring it straight in to the bowl and accidentally pouring the whole bottle in – I could just see Archie doing that on purpose!
Yes, they really should put filter tops on vanilla extract bottles!
hey ive been watching your videos but never commented would like to add a suggestion for your pastry and i know it probably like teaching grannys to suck eggs lol but once you have cut it put it in the fridge for 15 minutes to chill the pastry again this should help stop it shrinking well done though brill as usually and your braver then i am when me and munch cook we generally wear the ingrediants rather then cooking then but hey its fun lol
Hello Munchkins Mum, You are so right! The fridge would have helped! I tried to cut out as many stages as possible to make it \”Archie friendly\” – and the result is there for all to see!!
I find that if there are too long waits between the stages, he loses interest. Sadly I think this particular recipe just wasn't to be!
And LOL @ \”wearing the ingredients\”!!
I'm seeing your page for the first time today after hearing you on BBC three counties radio. What an adorable little boy and what a very loving Dad he obviously has. Archie's "helpful" interventions in the cooking process of your tarts makes your video unique and highly amusing! You ought to be on TV with your own cookery show! It would go down a storm, with viewers on the edge of their seats to see what Archie was going to do next to try and "help" Dad with the recipe!
P.S. The tarts don't look bad at all! I would volunteer to try one for you! (maybe not one of the "Archie" ones, though).
Ah thanks for your really kind comments, Elizabeth, and for taking the time to visit the site. Lorna and I had a lot of fun cooking these recipes, I am glad they tempted you over to the website… And yes, Archie is of course always, ahem, \”helpful\”!!!
Oh dear!! All I can say is that you are a braver and more patient man than me
As other readers have pointed out, baking beans would have helped with the puffing up, but only time in the fridge would have cured the shrinkage! Nextr time somebody asks me "why do you bother chilling the pastry?", may I please refer them here?! 
And for what it's worth, I don't think they looked that disastrous at all!
Dont worry, use prebought puff pastry next time..way easier! I love the site by the way! Louise
I finally found time to watch this one Nick (was saving it for an 'Ani-needs-cheering-up' moment!). Brilliant!
It's lovely is to see how much Archie has developed since the earlier videos too – I was impressed by him whisking eggs and adding the sugar on his own. I thought you were going to have another 'oregano gate' with the cinnamon at the end!
Hope the book is coming on well,
Ani
Hilarious video! Archie is a real character. The wrestling with the vanilla bottle was excellent not to mention mixing the pastry into the eggs – lovely. You have oodles of patience. Tarts looked pretty good too!!
you're a inspiration. i'm blogging about life as a man who looks after children (http://househusbandconfessions.wordpress.com), and my last entry was about swearing at my children. you have extraordinary patience (and a very sweet son)
My tummy hurts with laughing – what a genius video of the realities of cooking with littlies – so so so funny. You did so well keeping your sense of humour. How do you manage to film it – I'm guessing you must have your camera on a tripod. And what is Archie standing on?
I was listening to a podcast that featured you and as soon as I got home I looked you up on the internet. How very entertaining! My niece was describing a baking session that she had with her 2 year old daughter. They ended up wearing most of the flour but her little girl was so proud of the cookies and couldn't wait until her daddy came home to try them! I have joined your mailing list and look forward to checking in from Canada now and then to see what you and Archie are up to next. Good Luck!!